Before my life almost ended…
So, before some idiot driver decided to test my speed racer skills by driving me and my kids off the 10 in the middle of the desert I had an epiphany. One of relationships past and how they move with us into the future. What follows may sound like gibbrish but try and keep up.
Have you ever had a relationship seemingly start from nothing for no apparent reason and then prematurely end the same way it started? Well I’ve had more than my fair share and my most recent experience was probably the most difficult to accept. But, I think I’m coming across the true purpose of that friendship. Over the last two or three years I’ve experienced from an interesting vantage point the very real defining moments, pressures and choices my own children will eventually have to make. I always thought I was teaching in those moments when truth be told I should have been taking notes of all the lessons given to me.
I have a better understanding now of not only what my kids may keep from me, but why. I’ve been forced to brutal honesty of some very serious experiences in my own life so that someone else’s can be normalized. I’ve learned that in that normalcy walls come down and people open up. I don’t want my kids to be afraid of me. To worry that the perception of disappointment is more important than their well being and health. I don’t want them to feel a need to carry the burden of my issues.
For some odd reason I was given a coach of sorts to help prepare me for these times to come. I don’t know why and I don’t know if all parents are lucky enough to have one -or many, but I’m glad and grateful that some of the best moments I’ve had over the past few years are in fact more than just memories.
